


A Memory I Can Use

by cassiopeiasara



Series: I'm gonna wash away everything (till you come home to me) [1]
Category: Agent Carter (TV)
Genre: Adele Inspired Angst, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-04
Updated: 2016-01-04
Packaged: 2018-05-11 19:52:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5639869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cassiopeiasara/pseuds/cassiopeiasara
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“Oh? Where you goin this time?”</i>
  <br/>
  <i>Peggy slowly stroked the side of her cup. “Los Angeles.” There was something in the hitch of her voice that caused Angie to turn from her place at the stove. </i>
  <br/>
  <i>“How long?” Angie tried to keep her tone conversational but the fear was evident. </i>
  <br/>
  <i>“I’m moving there I’m afraid.” Peggy stared into her cup and Angie’s shoulders slumped as she sat down across from her.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Memory I Can Use

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sarah_dude](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarah_dude/gifts).



> One time sarah_dude asked for a Cartinelli fic inspired by Adele's "All I Ask" and this happened. I hope you enjoy the pain friend. <3
> 
> Thanks to turnitintolove for being my beta. 
> 
> Disclaimer: These ladies are the property of Marvel and I seek no profit.

Angie hummed as she turned the key and walked into her home. Her callback went surprisingly well and she felt perhaps her circumstances would change soon. She noticed Peggy’s coat in the foyer and wondered what she was doing home so early.

It didn’t take long to find Peggy sitting at their kitchen table with a cup of tea and a notebook that held symbols Angie would never understand.

“Hiya Pegs, what are you doing home so early?” she greeted as she moved toward the stove.

Peggy turned slightly at the sound of Angie’s voice and smiled at her. “I got off a bit early, I have to do some packing.”

Angie moved to make herself some tea. “Oh? Where you goin this time?”

Peggy slowly stroked the side of her cup. “Los Angeles.” There was something in the hitch of her voice that caused Angie to turn from her place at the stove.

“How long?” Angie tried to keep her tone conversational but the fear was evident.

“I’m moving there I’m afraid.” Peggy stared into her cup and Angie’s shoulders slumped as she sat down across from her.

There was a part of Angie that screamed _Let me come too_ , that hoped Peggy was setting her up to ask if she’d come with her. She could do movies out there, she could... Something in Peggy’s eyes stopped that thought immediately and Angie knew. She knew better than to hope. She learned long ago not to read too much into stolen glances and treasured confidences. But that knowledge couldn’t have prepared her for something like this happening.

"Movin’?"

Peggy started to wring her hands and shrugged. "Well, only for a short while probably. They need my help and Daniel is heading the office out there so I-"

Angie held up a hand and nodded as she cut her off, "You gotta go."

Peggy stopped moving her hands and clutched them tightly on the table and bowed her head. "I'm sorry Angie."

"It's all right English," replied Angie with a shrug of her shoulders.

Peggy leaned a little closer and lifted a hand to place on Angie’s forearm but thought better of it, gesturing around them instead. "You may stay of course, however long you'd like, I've worked it out with Howard though he didn't take much convincing."

She was stalling, Angie knew how this ended and so did Peggy but maybe, just maybe, it hurt Peggy more than Angie would guess.

“When do you leave?” Angie lifted her head for the first time since she sat down. There had to be time right? Peggy wouldn’t just up and leave. Angie could figure that much.

Peggy’s eyes darted across the room, anywhere but at Angie’s. “Tomorrow morning.”

Angie’s eyebrows shot up. “You’re joking, Pegs, what the heck? You can’t just up and leave. You have a life here and you’re going to just abandon it for some mission you don’t even know about. How can you?!” She slammed her fist hard on the table, causing Peggy to jump slightly.

Peggy groaned a little as she replied, “Angie, this is my job. It’s the way things work. I can’t just say no to a perfectly good opportunity. Listen,” she reached between them to hold Angie’s hand, “I’ll miss you too.”

Angie withdrew her hand so quickly that Peggy didn’t realize it had happened until she felt only the pad of her own hand. “I’m sorry Angie, truly I am.”

“You have no idea English. You don’t even, uh, I can’t believe you.” She got up and headed toward the stairs.

Peggy was hot on her heels. “Angie,” she called as she reached the top of the stairs. Angie stopped and Peggy moved closer. She placed a hand on Angie’s forearm. “Talk to me.”

When Angie turned, she was fiercely wiping at the tears in her eyes. Peggy knitted her eyebrows and held up a hand to help wipe the tears before Angie stopped her with her own. “It’ll just make it worse.”

Peggy reluctantly withdrew her hand and whispered, “What’s wrong?”

Angie sniffled and shook her head. “S’nothing English. You should just leave it.”

Peggy curled her fingers into fists at her sides and huffed. “I’m not sure I could do that.”

She paused for a minute before she pleaded, “Will you just tell me? Come on, Angie. There isn’t anything you can’t tell me.”

“This might be an exception.” They reached Angie’s room and she opened the door quickly before slamming it, not sparing Peggy another glance.

* * *

Peggy knew it was safe to knock when Billie Holiday gave way to Duke Ellington. Angie took a shorter time than Peggy expected to answer the door.

Angie didn’t smile but she looked calmer than she had earlier. “Yeah?”

Peggy wrung her hands and shifted a bit. “Could we talk?”

Angie stepped back and opened the door further. Peggy closed the door behind her and sat in the chair next to Angie’s bed. “I wish you could come, I’m not sure what I’ll do without my Saturday Martinelli cannolis.” She offered a small smile.

Angie rolled her eyes and gripped the edges of the bed. “You’ll survive, English.”

Peggy sighed and leaned forward. “I’m sorry I’ve upset you, You must know I’ve come to...” She sat up straighter and cleared her throat. “I’ve come to care a great deal for you and I-”

“You have?” Angie released the edge of the bed and looked up at Peggy for the first time.

There was a hopefulness in her expression that Peggy didn’t quite understand. “Of course, you’re the closest friend I’ve had in a long time and I-”

Angie sighed. “Oh.” She placed her hands in her lap, squared her shoulders, and looked up again. “You’ll make other friends Peg.”

Peggy placed a hand on Angie’s. “But none of them as dear as you.”

Angie stood and moved to the window next to her bed. She sighed as she crossed her arms and looked down at the street below them. “I should have known.”

“Known what?” Peggy stood and tentatively moved toward Angie. Peggy’s hand searched for Angie’s but when they touched, Angie withdrew her hand and brought her arms to cross over her stomach and turned her back to Peggy.  

“I couldn't keep you.” The words were soft and Peggy swore she could feel her heart breaking.

Peggy wanted so much to correct her. She wanted to remind Angie that this was only temporary, they would keep in touch, they could still be close from across the country but Peggy didn’t like making promises she couldn’t keep.

Angie turned slightly and confessed, “I love you, you know? I tried not to but damn Pegs, it’s too hard not to and I couldn’t tell ya cause I know you’ll never-”

“Wait, just wait.” Peggy threw up a hand in emphasis. She started to pace a bit and stopped in front of Angie, pointing at her and asked, “You what?”

Angie sniffled and swiped gently at her cheeks. “I love you.” Peggy shook her head and stared at her. Angie shrugged and pointed at her. “See? I told you, nothing can make that better. And you just had to make it worse. You couldn’t just leave it like I asked. Why Pegs? Huh? Why does it even-”

Peggy moved to hold Angie’s waist as she turned her so they were face to face. “I need to tell you something.” She sighed and It wasn’t until she felt Angie brush her cheek that she realized she was also crying.

“Don’t Peg, please just don’t. We can’t, it doesn’t change things. You’ll still leave in the morning and I can’t.” Angie shook her head but brought her arms to rest around Peggy.

“What if I, if we, well,” Peggy paused. How could she ask this without it sounding like an ending? “You’re right, I’m still leaving in the morning but what if tonight we pretended I wasn’t going?”

Angie scoffed, “What good would that do?”

Peggy squeezed her waist and brought a hand up to lift Angie’s chin. “Please Angie, let me do this for you. Look if you won’t let me say it, can I show you?”

Angie paused for so long that Peggy was sure she’d say no. Peggy didn’t have much to offer in this moment and Angie was right, it wouldn’t change things but Peggy hoped above all else, Angie might allow her to give what she knew she could. Finally, Angie swallowed thickly and replied, “Please.”

Peggy leaned forward and cupped Angie’s cheek as she finally brought her lips to Angie’s.

* * *

Angie knew the moment Peggy's lips touched her skin that this was it. This was the most excited she'd ever felt, the most anticipated act and yet this would be the only time. She knew  though that it was something she could hold onto if nothing else. There would be no after Peggy. It would forever and always be just her. At least there was tonight. At least Peggy extended her this moment and she chose to run with it.

It didn't surprise Angie that Peggy read her so well, she mapped her body like any other strategy. It didn't take long at all to notice that the base of Angie's neck was her true weakness while the place Peggy kissed her ribs offered no response and just below her right breast elicited the smallest of whimpers.

Peggy stopped somewhere near Angie’s hip and looked up as she dragged her hand up Angie’s leg. “Angie?”

Angie blinked a few times and looked up at Peggy as the other woman moved up closer to her face. “Yeah?”

Peggy looked down for a moment as if gathering some strength she thought she might lose. “I lo-”

Angie shot up and swallowed the confession with a kiss. “Please Peg, just show me ok. Just keep showin me. The moment you say it, I’ll remember that it’s just tonight.”

Peggy nodded and kissed her again before she peppered her neck with kisses and brought her hand to the apex of Angie’s thighs and began to stroke her clit as Angie’s head fell back.

“God,” she sighed. She brought her hand up to clutch Peggy’s arm and braced herself to move against Peggy’s hand as she started to kiss Peggy’s shoulder. “Damn, English.”

Peggy let out a light chuckle. “You’re beautiful like this, you know?”

Angie rolled her eyes. “You’re al-” She stopped a moment as Peggy turned her hand and sped up. “Hmmm,” she sighed and bit Peggy’s shoulder, earning a deep moan from her. “You’re already doing great Pegs, no need for additional comments.”

“Hmm, yes, well I-” She stopped as Angie moved onto her neck. “I just like to state the facts as I see them.” Angie moved her mouth behind Peggy’s ear, causing her to sigh deeply as she warned, “Darling, you’re going to need to stop that or I won’t be able to concentrate.”

Angie kissed her cheek and leaned back a little, “I’m not doin’ anything English.”

Peggy shook her head and let out a triumphant laugh when she increased her speed again, rendering Angie speechless as she started to clutch the sheets around them.

She locked eyes with Peggy for a moment before she became completely undone and sighed as she laid back on the sheets. Peggy placed a kiss on her forehead and pulled the sheets over them both.

After a few moments, Angie rolled over her and hovered right above Peggy’s ear and whispered, “Your turn, Pegs.”

Peggy’s chuckles quickly turned into heavy sighs as Angie resumed her spot behind Peggy’s ear and moved to kiss and leave traces Peggy knew she’d remember long after this night ended.  

* * *

They reached for each other three more times that night. The first two were a repeat of the first set of actions, attempts to fit into hours what they would otherwise hope to explore in years but the last time was just to hold one another. Peggy kept trying to say the words Angie wouldn’t allow and as morning crept closer, she wondered if the chance would ever come.

Angie touched Peggy’s cheek. “I know it’s true but you asked if we could pretend and if I do that then I can picture you sayin' it proper. Sayin' it in the morning before you leave for just another day or at night before we go to sleep. I can pretend it’s more than this.”

Peggy nodded. “Can I at least confess how long?”

Angie winked. “Since the moment you met me?”

Peggy laughed. “Obviously.”

Angie kissed her and squeezed her hip. “Knew it.”

Peggy shook her head as she kissed Angie’s cheek and moved to hover above her as Angie turned to lay on her back. Peggy pushed a piece of hair out of Angie’s hair out of her face and stroked her cheek with her thumb. “You honestly won’t let me tell you?”

Angie smiled sadly. “We got time for that. Remember?”

Peggy returned her smile and nodded. “Of course we do.”

When the light started to pour into Angie’s room, Peggy sat up and checked the clock. There wasn’t much time. She needed to catch her plane and she knew if she stayed, she’d never leave. She waited until she was sure Angie was asleep before she left. She could give her at least that much.

Peggy tucked the sheets in around Angie as she sighed softly and Peggy smiled. “I love you,” she whispered as she placed a kiss on Angie’s forehead and wished somehow for things to be different.

Peggy gathered her clothes and shut the door quietly behind her.

“I told you not to say it,” whispered Angie to the empty room as she pressed her eyelids together and tried unsuccessfully to stop the tears that began to well in her eyes.


End file.
